#21
Imagine Yourself at Your own Funeral
If you could change anything right now about your life, what would it be? |
If I could change one thing in my life right now, It would be getting my license sooner. I currently have my permit but I am getting my Drivers License on Thursday (September 9). I feel like having your drivers license gives you so much more freedom to do what you want. Especially as a teenager, freedom and the ability to go to a friends house, drive myself to work and school, or drive to my moms is so myuch easily when you have your license. I would have gotten it months ago but I procrastinated and had to wait 4 months later.
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#22
Repeat to Yourself,
"Life Isn't an Emergency"
Describe a time or moments in your life when you turn something into an emergency? |
There is definitely more than one instance where I have turned something small or temporarily unimportant into an emergency. For instance, it was my friends birthday and I had said I was already going. Usually when I say im going that means that it is set in stone. The day before, my dad said I couldn’t go because we were already going to be doing stuff and I had a sporting event the next morning. 12 year old me did not like this. I cried so much and was so sad for th next two days because I really did feel like this party was an emergency and I had to go. Did younger me realize that there would be more birthdays to come and that I could hang out with her any other time? No. My brain was set that I missed out on the biggest thing ever.
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#23
Experiment with your back burner
Analyze:
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I agree with this quote very much. Sometimes our back burners have ideas that the front burners don't have, or can't come up with at the moment. Our brains want to figure out a situation on the fly but in some situations, problem solving comes with time. Also, getting frustrated when you cannot figure something out is all too common. Our back burner provides that extra push of motivation when we lose hope, saying "Take a deep breath and brainstorm some more" or "You got this". The front burners are like the extroverts that take charge and back burners are like the quiet introvert that is very intelligent. If you think about it, it has probably helped more situations than you think. Our back burners are our safety net off problem solving.
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#24
Spend a moment everyday thinking of someone to thank
Who is one person you would thank you in this moment and why? |
One person that I would like to thank is my father. He is so hardworking and always tries to provide the best for my and my brother. Although he is tough sometimes, I know that it is out of love and he wishes the best for us. He inspires me everyday because on top if being a police officer and risking his life, he comes home from a 12 hour plus shift to work on his homework. He does college courses to further educate himself on the law to make him better in his work place. He proves that you can always be better even if you think you have reached the top.
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#25
Smile at strangers, look into their eyes and say hello
When you read this chapter, regarding eye contact & connect, what are your initial thoughts?
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My initial thoughts were: Yes, absolutely. That's true. Do I do that? Guilty. I took a moment to think if I took the small gesture of looking up when I see people in the hallway or not. Most of the time it is a yes, but it honestly really depends on my mood that day or how my morning started. Although I have a bad day, My mood shouldn't effect how I treat others. A simple smile or a hello could possible make someones entire day, especially if they don't have that many friends or if they also had a bad morning. Also, I believe that this can make people tell what kind of person you are. If you just walk by a person without saying anything it is whatever, but if you say hello then you are making your mark and sticking out instead of staying in the shadows.
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#26
Set aside quiet time, every day
When do you find a quiet moment in your day, every day, just to be present and quiet? Do you? or perhaps you don't... explain. |
If I am being honest, I rarely find quiet time for myself. My days are filled with school, working out, practice, homework, and sleep. I really I wish I had that time to just turn my brain off and not worry about any materialistic thing. There has been rare moments in which I have taken this time and I took full advantage of it. I would put my projector on to play rain noises, and at the same time it projects a window. I grab my favorite book at the moment, sit in my bed under my covers, turn my led lights on a cool color, put my phone on DND, and just let my body and mind relax. Those are the moments I really cherish.
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#27
Imagine the People in your Life as Tiny Infants and as One-Hundred-Year-Old Adults
Describe a time when you have been frustrated with someone, but you "let go" of the situation and moved forward with your life. |
I can get frustrated at people and things very easily. I blame it on being an Aries but we all know it isn't that accurate. I was very frustrated at my mom multiple times for various different reasons. I would get so mad, where it really ruined our relationship for long periods of time. Although, it was very upsetting I decided to put it behind me. A motel isn't something you can just drop like a friend because she will be around forever. It is better to forgive and let situations go instead of holding on to them. especially the little things that really aren't a big deal.
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#28
Seek First to Understand
Describe a situation in which you didn’t seek to understand first. Was there resolution with this conflict? |
A time I didn’t seek to understand is why my dad is always on me. Whether its my room, grades, where I am, what I am doing, who I am with, etc. Although it is exhausting adn I don’t think he will ever understand, I know he does this because he has high expectations of me. To this day he still does it and I still get mad, but maybe I should be better at understand his why and not mine.
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#29
Become a Better Listener
Who is someone you can genuinely talk to, that you know will listen to you. Describe that relationship. |
I do not really share my feelings a lot and a lot of people know that. There will be occasions where my emotions do get built up and I need to just let it out but most of the time I keep it to myself. I am better at listening to people rant then ranting myself. If it does get to the point where I need to rant I usually go to some friends that I know won’t judge me or say something taht will make me even more mad.
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#30
Choose Your Battles Wisely
Describe a time when you lost your shiitake mushrooms and in reality it wasn’t worth the energy. How did you feel after the confrontation? Could it have gone differently if you didnt sweat the small stuff? |
A time I lost my shit was coming home from my orthepedic appointment. I started bawling out of frustration and ranting to my mom because the doctor in my eyes made me feel like the pain I was feeling wasn’t a big deal. I was also frustrated because they misdiagnosed me he first time and I was livid. I felt as if there was no straight answer to my pain and that I my knee wouldn’t be back to normal in time for sporst again. After a couple of days of cooling down I realized that i should’ve been more grateful it wasn’t what they initially diagnosed me with (torn meniscus) because that would require surgery, etc. Also, healing will not happen over night, and thats ok.
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#31
Be Aware of Your Moods, and Don't Let Yourself be Fooled by the Low Ones
Explain a time when you were in a bad mood and how it shaped your day. Vise Versa, explain a time when you were in a great mood and discuss the day you had. |
A won’t say specifically the reason I was in a bad mood but that day I wanted to be by myself. I was short with my friends, had no desire to be at school, and my dad was making me really mad so I didn’t want to go home. On days like these I try my best to go straight to one of my outlets to get my anger out whether that a sport, lifting or reading. On a good day, It is awesome. My friends always seem to look at me weird because I am more peppy and talkative then I normally am. In the beginning of the school year, these days were almost always Fridays because of the weekend and football games. Those were my best memories.
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#32
Life Is a Test. It is Only a Test.
"As an experiment, see if you can apply this idea to something you are forced to deal with" right now. Explain your emotions and logic behind this situation. Can you rise above it? |
Life is a test, yes perfect, I agree. Life is only a test? No. Life is a test and a lesson. It throws curveballs and you, it tries to drag you down, and it really tests your skills and ability to stay grounded and focused. But within these, are lessons. Personally I think my life test me in multiple ways, I do fail at times and I pass other times. My life has multiple answers though, not just a right or wrong. Like a "Select all that apply" kind of test because sometimes my problems take multiple solutions.
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#33
Praise and Blame Are All the Same
You will not please everyone...how does this statement sit with you and why do we tend to focus on the negative rather than the positive? |
I fully agree with this statement. You will not please everyone and that is life. I understand and live through this saying. Your life becomes so much more relaxed when you stop caring about other peoples perspectives of you and start only focusing on how you view yourself. I think we tend to focus on the negative because we fear it. Having someone have a negative perspective of you is more unsettling than a positive outlook which we usually just look over. I am still working on not caring about pleasing anyone unnecessary but I am in a good place currently on my progress.
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#34
Practice Random Acts of Kindness
Describe a time when you complete RAK and how did it make you feel? |
A meaningful act of kindness in my life that is pretty constant is buying the person behind me their dutch drink. When I am in line, I get free drinks their anyway because that is my place of work, so usually if it is one of my friends or even a random person, I try to pay for their drink. It makes me feel really good, because you are doing it for someone else and they aren't doing anything to provoke you (like I owe them or they owe me). Also, its a higher possibility that they will pass on the kindness to someone else.
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#35
Look Beyond Behavior
In your own words, describe the meaning of loving-kindness. |
Loving-Kindness is being empathetic and understanding. It's loving people despite their behavior or changing your level of love because of a certain event. The kindness is treating people how you wanted to be treated, with love in your heart. If someone is having a bad day and you go up to them with loving kindness, maybe you just had an impact on them and made their mood that much better. To just live your life with that will bring so much light and love in your life. If a person approaches me with loving-kindness two things go through my mind. One, wow this person is really nice and has a seriously bubbly personality. Two, are they always like this or is it only around new people, do they act like this towards their friends as well? But if a person is continuously living with loving-kindness then that second thought will fade with consistent interaction.
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#36
See the Innocence
What occurs when we practice compassion toward others and let go of "their" story, rather than be caught up in the drama of a situation? |
When we practice compassion and letting go of all the different sides of the story, and focus on consoling and understanding, we will feel better and the person we are listening to will also feel better. Why bring yourself into drama when it really isn"t necessary. It's important to see the innocence of their actions, and not inject yourself into the situation and give your opinion. But at the same time, the backstory is important if they are in the wrong, and they can't see that. Is it compassionate to not tell them that they are the ones that aren't innocent? If I was in the wrong in a situation, I would want to know if I was unable to see it.
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#37
Choose Being Kind over Being Right
Define equanimity. Do you practice this in your life? Look to your Ego first before you answer... |
Equanimity is mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation. Unfortunately, as much as I want to say I practice that, I don't as much as I should. I rarely get mad or really pissed off, but when I do I usually don't think before I say. Especially in petty arguments with my brother or my dad. Or even when, my brother just randomly walks in my room and I start yelling at him. I most of the time think I am right, which is an awful characteristic I have, because my brain always thinks I need to defend myself when challenged. But sometimes in the defense, it gets a little out of control. I should practice Equanimity more in my life.
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#38
Tell Three People (today) How Much You Love Them
In picking three people, who would you choose, and why? |
I would pick my grandma Marty, my dad, and my grandma Cilla. I would call my grandma Marty because she has recently had some health issues and has been in a rehab facility. Unfortunately, I cannot go visit because I am not vaccinated, and that isn't allowed in the facility. You never know when something can go wrong with your older family members so it is important to tell them you love them. I would call my dad because he is so hardworking and truly the best. I don't tell him I love him enough, only when he is going somewhere or I am leaving on a trip or something. He provides so much for my brother and I, and I see it and acknowledge it to myself but not to him as much. I would call my other grandma, grandma Cilla because I see her maybe 7 times a year. Only during holidays or spontaneous visits. She lives in Stockton and I am just so busy all the time, but should really try to make it down there more.
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#39
Practice Humility
Describe a time when you saw an individual or a group lack humility. How did that make you feel about said individual/group? No need to share names in this example. |
A time that I saw an individual lack humility is when they thought they were going to get handed an award or "prize". They were so adamant that they were going to get it, and definitely lacked humbleness. This made me feel kind of taken a back by this individual, because you can't just go into something thinking that you for sure are going to get something because you're "better" than everyone else. It was definitely a yikes moment when they didn't end up getting in, and someone else did. Hopefully it was a wake up call.
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#40
When in Doubt about Whose Turn It Is to Take out the Trash, Go Ahead and Take it Out
What is a perspective/opinion of this article? Valid, or a waste of time? |
I do not think it is a waste of time, and I do agree with this article in the sense of taking the reins when needed or in challenging times and when to leave some slack for other people to hold and tighten. For example, in sports there is a time when you need to step up and be the leader and take control. Sometimes there is stuff on the field or court that coaches don’t see from the sideline. It's ok to speak up and take control and point out what needs to be done, but at the same time, you don’t want to overstep your boundaries because you are not the coach and you can’t always be controlling when it isn’t your place. But then again if you don’t speak up there is a possibility that the problem won’t get resolved. This is a hard concept to say the least.
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#41
Avoid Weatherproofing
Do you weatherproof? Explain. |
I feel like I weather proof do an extent, but not severely. Over the past few years I have changed my perspective on judgment and finding the negativity in people. I feel like I used to do that a lot in protection of myself, because if I seek something bad then that will make my brain think I have a valid reason to not make a connection with someone on a deeper level. Now I try my best to look at the good in other people, and not the flaws. EVERYONE has flaws, their is not one singular perfect person in the world, so why seek perfection in others?
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#42
Spend a Moment, Every Day, Thinking of Someone to Love
Who Do You Choose to Send Love to in this Moment? |
In this moment, I choose to send love to my grandma who is currently in a facility recovering from a stroke. She had a stroke during the summer and has been recovering ever since. This is going to be the first time in a very very long time that she has not been at home for Christmas. She usually put up a tree and a bunch of indoor decorations with real candy canes everywhere, so I know this year might be a little hard. It has also been awhile since I have seen her because she is in a place that requires a covid vaccine and I do not have one. So I am sending love to my grandma this season and at all times to be frank. She is the toughest person I know, and does not give up on anything.
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#43
Become an Anthropologist
Reflect on the following: "judging others takes a great deal of energy and, without exception, pulls you away from where you want to be" |
I agree with this because in reality, you should really only be worrying about yourself and not other people. Wasting energy on other people and judging how their lifestyle or thinking differs from yours is so pointless. In the quote it says, “pulls you away from where you want to be”, and this related to the thought process of if you just focus on yourself, then you will have more personal growth because you are the only one occupying your headspace. With judgement comes so much hate, and it is so unnecessary. One of my favorite judgment quotes is, “We should not judge people by their peak of excellence; but by the distance they have traveled from the point where they started.” You don’t know what people have gone through or what they have done to get there. Just don’t judge before you know, and worry about yourself.
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#44
Understand Separate Realities
Why is it important to see the differences amongst one another in our small intimate circle to cultures around the world? |
I feel like it is toxic to not broaden your thinking beyond what it within your immediate surroundings. It is important to understand other cultures around the world because we are all the the same floating rock in the universe and it is just so fascinating to see the different ways of life that people live. I actually am very passionate about this because I am majoring in international relation and global affairs. It has a lot to do with politics and cultural connections between countries. I just believe that It just makes you a more educated person to be informed on different cultures of the world. You can have the best degree in the world, but if you are not knowledgeable of the world around you then, your level of intelligence goes down.
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#45
Develop Your Own Helping Rituals
What are some ways you can help the spread of kindness towards others?
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Spreading the kindness towards other starts with you. Just a simple complement walking down the halls or even a hello. It’s the little things that can make a big ripple. A compliment on their outfit or their smile, or if they are an athlete say they played really well. I know when that happens to me, it makes me feel really good because I am my biggest doubter and need reassurance to pull me out of the hole of self destruction. If you are kind to others, others will be kind to others, and it will create a chain of RAK. Ive seen it happen a lot in fast food lines so why not in life?
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#46
Every Day, Tell Atleast One Person Something You Like, Admire or Appreciate About Them
Give someone a compliment via text message or DM. Who did you choose and how did it make you feel to support another person?
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I chose one of my friend on the boys basketball team. After a tough game he is exactly like me, takes the game to heart and carries the teams emotions on your back. The past game he almost fouled out and was visibly frustrated with himself. After I actually saw him in person and said that he played really good and ultimately they came out with a win. I know that is how I feel after games that a personally tough but you have to look at the bigger picture especially if you came out on top. It made me feel good to support other people especially those who need it more than others.
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#47
Argue for Your Limitations, They’re Your
Discuss a time when you had self doubt and set limitations on yourself. How did you or how can you change this behavior? |
A time when I had self doubt was last year when I threw at Masters for Track and Field. I was so nervous because I was playing against the best of the best in the section. I felt like an imposter and that I shouldn’t be there. I seriously doubted my abilities and that really messed with how I performed. My coach also was not there to give me the push only a coach can, so it was really hard. I ended up doing really bad. But I changed my mindset of “You absolutely bombed that” to “You are here as a Junior and going this far is a really big accomplishment”. It made me believe in myself for next time and made me ultimately proud of where I got.
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